Comments on THINGS THEY WON'T TELL YOU IN FILM SCHOOL: WE'LL ALWAYS HAVE PARIS

I do worry about little Tinkerbell. Hard time is s...

2007-06-10T15:54:00.000-07:00

I do worry about little Tinkerbell. Hard time is so tough on the chihauhuas left behind.

Loved the comments about Paris. I avoid Hiltons (t...

2007-06-10T15:19:00.000-07:00

Loved the comments about Paris. I avoid Hiltons (the hotels and the people) at all costs, because if even one penny of my hotel dollars goes to her, it's too much. I will not fund her antics.

I'm glad she's back in prison. I'm glad the judge sent her back. I'm sick of celebrities getting the white-glove treatment when they go to jail. If anyone in my very noncelebrity circle was guilty of the same offense, they'd be in jail. And they'd be depressed about it too. But if they were depressed, they'd be given some sort of therapy or medication, not a free pass to house arrest in a mansion.

The only thing I hate about Paris in jail is that somehow, she'll probably turn it into something...like a ghostwritten autobiographical sketch of celebrity prison time. Yes, it would be ghostwritten, because I doubt she can write or spell autobiography.

My understanding is that her skin became very dry ...

2007-06-09T14:33:00.000-07:00

My understanding is that her skin became very dry during her time in the big house. Seriously, this was reported in Star Magazine and repeated by Nancy Grace, from whom I get all my important felonious celebrity news. My suggestion is Sheriff Baca be made to apply the alleged cheeseburger to those dry, rough patches and exfoliate the inmate with ketchup to exercise the Hasselhoffian Right to public humiliation.

Well, maybe she's learned a little something catch...

2007-06-09T07:31:00.000-07:00

Well, maybe she's learned a little something catching up on her emails from Nicole while she was home and from now on she'll drive around town eating TRANS FAT cheeseburgers with her lights off and her legs up in the air.

I think a lot of hookers live on my block too....t...

2007-06-08T21:09:00.000-07:00

I think a lot of hookers live on my block too.

...they could also be rich NYU students. The styles are just about the same.

Great piece. Most observers decry the omni-covera...

2007-06-08T18:58:00.000-07:00

Great piece. Most observers decry the omni-coverage of Paris in the written and broadcast media. I say the more we see of her the better. The democratic (lower case), egalitarian part of my soul has always rejoiced in the mere existence of La Hilton: she is a constant reminder that money cannot buy taste and that breeding does not produce class.

This will be the only place I hear about PH this w...

2007-06-08T08:03:00.000-07:00

This will be the only place I hear about PH this week where I'm not annoyed I even know her initials. That was actually thoughtful.

a hooker with her john going through a Jack In The...

2007-06-08T07:07:00.000-07:00

a hooker with her john going through a Jack In The Box... irony at it's finest

At least it's not your husband. Even Dear Abby cou...

2007-06-07T22:13:00.000-07:00

At least it's not your husband. Even Dear Abby couldn't help you with that one.

"...pair of trannies" - I love it. I have to disa...

2007-06-07T19:02:00.000-07:00

"...pair of trannies" - I love it. I have to disagree with your "duck" metaphor, though. If it looks (well, okay... quacks)like a duck, and walks like a duck, sometimes it's my cat.